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Sunday, May 8, 2016

Tired


Some days there just doesn't seem to be a point to any of it. I'm so tired of being different; tired of having  to explain myself. tired of having to ask for clarification or for special consideration, and  I'm tired of when I do ask, feeling like I'm asking too much.

I will never be, think, or see the  world like most people, and I'm tired of feeling  like there's something wrong with me because I don't, or because my healthy doesn't look like what others expect. I'm tired of having that difference judged as "still not well yet" because it doesn't look like the well of people who have lived totally different lives then mine. I'm tired of trying to live up to standards of thinking, seeing and doing that I will never be able to accomplish, and feeling like there's is something wrong with me because I don't. 

But what I'm most tired of, is being told that the reason I feel these things is because I have self confidence issues or don't know how to love myself, and if I didn't judged myself and others so harshly, I would feel loved and connected to all.