Recently I've caught myself asking the how are you question as a greeting and not waiting for a real answer, and I hope I caught this in time to stop it from becoming a habit. ... I want my exchanges to be real. When I ask, "how are you", I want the one I'm asking to know that I care enough about them to ask, and that I am wanting to hear their answer. ...It doesn't have to take long; we can all judge how much time we have to connect with each other and then gage our exchanges accordingly, and we can continue the conversation at a later time if need be...
But more often than not when I ask such a question I receive the standard "I'm fine, thank-you". And so I'm not exactly sure what it is I'm being thanked for.
If I had a magic wand I think I'd eliminate ALL this kind of false talk so that 'real' communication and connection can take place. ... It's becoming common knowledge that disconnection is one of the most common ailments of our time, and possibly one that causes so many others. ...We also know that it's possible to be kind and considerate without lying, and seriously, I think if someone finds that difficult then they need to take a look at the reason why.
I think our wanting to make things expedient and less demanding of ourselves is one of the reasons we end up feeling disconnected and unfulfilled. And then we all go off and look for something else to fill that need, something quicker and more imediately gratifying....
I believe that real exchanges are a good place to start to healing our broken world.
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